worst pick up lines?

I've never posted in here before but i'm feeling frisky tonight so here goes... Damn baby, you must be a speeding ticket cause you got FINE written all over you! :laughingr Since most of you ladies in here have been around the block a few times:shhh: i'm sure you've heard worse than that. So....?

uh oh here it comes!(dont be too mean girls)

Since most of you ladies in here have been around the block a few times: Oh snap! I didn't see a thing..

I've never posted in here before but i'm feeling frisky tonight so here goes... Damn baby, you must be a speeding ticket cause you got FINE written all over you! :laughingr Since most of you ladies in here have been around the block a few times:shhh: i'm sure you've heard worse than that. So....? You may have earned a position in the doghouse with the ladies here, but you gave me a damn fine one to try at the club this friday! Keep them coming.

HOW ABOUT, "Do you wash your cloths in Windex? Because I can see myself in your pants." :bounce

My personal fav. is "That shirt is very becoming on you, but then again if I were on you, I'd be coming to"

i had a girl tell me "im part of the make a wish foundation, and my with is to get a ride on your bike, then ride you." i was buggging out.

fuckin sweet :rofl: but tee i hope you're playin when you say you're gonna use that :lol: i'd never imagine saying one of these to a chick unless i was tore down

fuckin sweet :rofl: but tee i hope you're playin when you say you're gonna use that :lol: i'd never imagine saying one of these to a chick unless i was tore down It's called the law of averages my man. If you snag one out of a hundred with a line like that, you figure you can get away with pretty much anything around her.

ok ok ok ...you walk up to a lady and say....WOW you must be exhausted!! she looks at you with stupidity and asks why (with an attitude) and you reply because you have been running thru my mind ALL DAY! oh oh OH!!!!!!!!!!! OK Ok OK..heres another.....you run up to a FINE piece of ASS and and say....oh my god baby are you ok?? (acting all worried) when she looks at you (either with a look of disgust or shocked because she has NO CLUE whats going on) and she replies no Im fine why?? you camly look into her eyes and say (here comes the cheese) because anything as beautiful as you had to fall from heaven....OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! gigiddy gigiddy.....:laughingr

The fool Glen Quagmire from Family Guy has the best bike up lines! *Walks to up two girls making out in a gay bar* "Hey, you ladies ever been penetrated?" *Gets throw out of bar* -------------------------------------- *walks up to lady Quagmire - "Hey, would you ever sleep with a complete stranger?" Lady - "No" Quagmire - "Hi, Glen Quagmire" *shakes hand.

These are actual lines I've received: "Man, you sure ride that bike like you know what you're doing. Think you can you give me some lessons?" "Dayumm, I thought you were sexy a minute ago, but now that I know you ride a bike, I think you're even sexier. When you gonna take me for a ride?" "Are you as fast as your bike?"

gigiddy gigiddy.....:laughingr allriiiight......

Wanna play house? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long. Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead? You must be Visa, because you're everywhere i want to be. just a few off the top of my head.

Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead? :headshake :rofl: that is wrong

you look at the tag inside her shirt and say "Just as i thought.... Made in Heaven"

Here's a couple ice breakers... "This is the first time I have ever talked to a woman without having to use a credit card." "Does transsexual porn turn you on as much as it does me? Boy, I can't get enough of that." "Pursuant to Megan's Law, I am obligated to tell you that I am a convicted sex offender." "Am I supposed to tell you if I have genital warts? Is that part of the rules?"

Here's a couple ice breakers... "This is the first time I have ever talked to a woman without having to use a credit card." "Does transsexual porn turn you on as much as it does me? Boy, I can't get enough of that." "Pursuant to Megan's Law, I am obligated to tell you that I am a convicted sex offender." "Am I supposed to tell you if I have genital warts? Is that part of the rules?" those are more somethin i'd use, particularly the first/third one. huh giggity giggity goo! the more smartass the better

ok girls what do you think. I was wondering if you have a moment to spare for me to hit on you? What's a sexy woman like you doing in a dirty mind like mine? Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package. Nice shoes wanna fuck? lol(never used this one before) below are my favorites. See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute So what haven't you been told tonight? So what a guy like me would have to do to get a cute girl like you? I noticed that in clubs this simple line works very good "Do you might if i dance with you") go from there

LETS PLAY CARPENTER, "FIRST WE GET HAMMERED THEN I NAIL YOU":laughingr

you look at the tag inside her shirt and say "Just as i thought.... Made in Heaven" nice:clap:

"Excuse me, can I get your opinion on something - does this handkerchief smell like chloroform to you?"

here is one I didn't see guy walks up to girl "Hey whats that sound?" girls listens for a second guy O yea, Thats the sound of the ambulance comming to take me away. Cause when I saw you my heart stoped.

try this sometime guys....(I'm tellin ya it works for some reason) While in the bar, walk up to a group of girls and tell one of them... "I'm going to f the living crap outta ya tonight" (make sure the whole group hears ya) Then, ignore the group all night. Guaranteed you bring one of them home. Then, once you give it to her good and she runs back to tell all her friends....you eventually get them too. This takes some time but it works LMAO. Warning, once they find out about all of them sharing you.....your not liked the same. But they still come back for more. HAHAHA Not really a cheesy line but thought I'd share. Try it, what do you have to loose?

LETS PLAY CARPENTER, "FIRST WE GET HAMMERED THEN I NAIL YOU":laughingr LOL :laughingr

Scream and i kill you :funny: :laughingr

"Get in the car bitch or you'll never see your mother again, decide."

all of my comments are aimed at sluts, if you're not a slut you'll think I'm an ass, which is good, cause when you act like I'm a piece of shit I know you're not a slut and hence I don't want to talk to you. However if you engage in conversation I know you're slutty and I will do thing to you later

alright here we go.. (Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand. Did you know your hair and my pillow are perfectly color coordinated. I can play the 1812 Overture on a touchtone phone with my tongue. classic: Do I know you? (No.) That's a shame, I'd sure like to.

my personal favorite and yes it works ......" If you were a booger I'd pick you" LMAO dont ask me how but it works.......

Scream and i kill you :funny: :laughingr HAHHAHA..thats just wrong......LMAO

Field tested by a friend of mine (average looking): Variations of the same theme: "I am out of inspiration tonight but I'd love to know you. Is it ok with you if I just ask you the time/your name/what's your sign etc" "I don't want to disrespect your intelligence with a stupid pickup line... so how about I just ask you the time/your name/what's your sign etc" But again, this guy is like Quagmire... He'll pickup anywoman... and I swear, he does not look that good, is not that bright. But he dresses well...

my personal favorite and yes it works ......" If you were a booger I'd pick you" LMAO dont ask me how but it works....... are the girls in preschool?

hope you got a big trunk....cause im puttin my bike in it!:hmmm:

LETS PLAY CARPENTER, "FIRST WE GET HAMMERED THEN I NAIL YOU":laughingr :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr

I think ladies should come up with topo 10 pick up lines.. whith ones did you like the most?

:lol: i think the ladies are long gone from this thread

:lol: i think the ladies are long gone from this thread They are all over here... :lol: Ballsawk3 for President! ~Vote Today~

You can never fail with "wanna hop on my boner?"

"nice shoes, wanna fuck?"

is that your sister (while talking to milf)

Hey how are you? Not that we've dispatched with the pleasantries lets fuck.

walk up to a chic and say " hey, you wanna go halves on a bastard?"

walk up to a chic and say " hey, you wanna go halves on a bastard?" :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr :funny: :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr

walk up to a chic and say " hey, you wanna go halves on a bastard?" :funny: :laughingr :lol:

are the girls in preschool? 18 and up even worked on a 31 year old..........on second thought im so sexy i can probably say whatever i want and get it to work :thumbup:

http://www.judithmoffatt.com/Art/mothergoose.jpg

walk up to a chic and say " hey, you wanna go halves on a bastard?" best one yet:funny: :laughingr :laughingr

"Excuse me, can I get your opinion on something - does this handkerchief smell like chloroform to you?" That shit is funny as hell:laughingr :laughingr that was great

Wanna do some math? you be 6, and I'll be the 9, lets see what we add up to be!

If you're really looking to land some ass make the chick validate herself to you. DO NOT CHASE HER make her chase you. You do not need to be anything more than an average looking guy for it to work. Don't let her know you think she's cute, she probably gets that 20 times a day. Seem uninterested and she will want you. It works a lot!! Make her think there is something wrong with her and she will want to show you there is not. And guys if a girl tells you "I'm not going to sleep with you tonight." You're home free already. This shows sleeping with you is already on her mind and she wants you to chase her. Don't bite though respond with something along the lines of, "good I wasn't planning on sleeping with you anyway." or "It's okay that other girl is hotter anyways." Girls hate it when other girls are hotter than they are. She will almost immediately try and prove you wrong. Then when it is time to leave say something along the line of, "So we are going back to my place now for some more drinks." Assert yourself without being overbearing. But let her know the decision has been made. If you assert yourself with confidence, make her think you are the alpha male, one of the 10% percent of men who do 90% of the fucking and you will be home free. But guys if you get back to your place and she really doesn't want to have sex then respect it. NO means no for real. not trying to be conceited here, just trying to help my bike peeps.

you got it. never give up your power to a chick or its game over.

Walk up to a girl and say "ok ok im not going to lie im hung like a field mouse in the middle of jan. but i have a 12 inch tongue and i can breath through my ears! What are you doing tonight?....

i have a 12 inch tongue and i can breath through my ears! is this KP?? :lol: jp, he used to have something like that in his sig

saw a tshirt the other night: "Hello - You'll do"

this might just work:laughingr

:funny:

if we were both Squirrels would you let me put my nuts in your hole

your like a 10 lb bass I dont know weather to mount you or eat you

Do you like walking I only live 5 min down the road. This worked lol

Heard the worst one of my life last night .... "What time do you get off?" My answer...(a time)...his reply..."No, about 5 minutes after I get started on you." :headshake

How about this classis line: "I'm well hung, my dick touches the ground while doing a slam-dunk". :laughingr

How about "Let's play army. I'll lay down and you can blow the hell out of me." I picked up one chick by asking her if she's ever had her naval licked?? From the inside.

Would you like to come over to my place for dinner and a movie tonight. By dinner of course I mean I will be eating you out, and by a movie, I mean I will be filming it!

personal favorite: guy excuse me but do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl i dont know(usually with a kind of discusted look on their face) guy enough to break the ice. hi my names...(insert name here)

personal favorite: guy excuse me but do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl i dont know(usually with a kind of discusted look on their face) guy enough to break the ice. hi my names...(insert name here) ROFL I actually like that one :P

ROFL I actually like that one :P +1 :thumbup:

Didnt read all these but heres a lame-o one... If i could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd put "U" and "I" together.

Here is though the art of pick-up lines were dead

personal favorite: guy excuse me but do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl i dont know(usually with a kind of discusted look on their face) guy enough to break the ice. hi my names...(insert name here) Damn that one is getting popular, I'm running out of lines.

Oh yeah I guess I need to put a few cheezy, corney ones: 1) Excuse me, is your father a farmer? Caz you sure do have nice melons. 2) You're the hottest things since a sunburn. 3) How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Let's find out. 4) Is that a mirror in your pants because i can see myself in them? 5) Quick...catch me please...because I've just fallen for you. 6) My name is ****...but you can call me tonight 7) Man your legs must be tired caz you've been running through my mind all night long. 8) I lost my number, can I have yours? 9) Look at her for a little bit and then say you have something (and make a gesture to have her look at her eye)...then reply "Oh it's a sparkle in your eye." 10) This works for the minority crowd. Walk up to a girl and say..."hey it looks like you have a little egyptian (or whatever ethnicity you are) in you. She reply 99 times out of 100, "No I don't." Want some? I guess on that note I could use "hey wanna see the great pyrmaid of Egypt?"...,sometimes if they are drunk enough go with it and convince them that you will be going to Egypt soon and you want to take them along...then when they think that, reply "I got it right here in my pants"...hehe

Just thought of another one... "I'm Milk...I do your body real good!"

You be the Dairy Queen and I'll be your Burger King: You treat me right, and I'll do it your way [Pretend to read your hand, do so quite poorly] What is a nice person like you doing in a place like this? (Huh?) [Lower left hand and raise right, read poorly] What's your sign? "Pinch me." "Why?" "You're so fine I must be dreaming." Baby, somebody better call God, cuz he's missing an angel! Did it hurt? She: Did what hurt? When you fell out of heaven? Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes. Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes? Do you have a BandAid? I just scrapped my knee falling for you. ok, i think im done here

I don't know if this is a worst pick up line but this is pathetic. http://www.gsxr.com/showthread.php?t=26151 On the internet looking for advice about picking up girls on a Motorcycle board.

i had a friend tell a girl one time "Give me some of that pussy, i know you got it on ya." and it worked!

Here ya go " Nice shoes want to fuck!" or "Damn girl you must work for UPS cuz you been checking out my package all night." "Is that a keg in your pants cuz I really want to tap that azz." It all fun and games!!!:bowdown:

"Hey i was watching this porno last night.. I saw this move but im afraid my gf wont like it.. Would u mind if i practice the move on you"

:thumbup: I like the Bruce Lee clip!!!

If you're really looking to land some ass make the chick validate herself to you. DO NOT CHASE HER make her chase you. You do not need to be anything more than an average looking guy for it to work. Don't let her know you think she's cute, she probably gets that 20 times a day. Seem uninterested and she will want you. It works a lot!! Make her think there is something wrong with her and she will want to show you there is not. And guys if a girl tells you "I'm not going to sleep with you tonight." You're home free already. This shows sleeping with you is already on her mind and she wants you to chase her. Don't bite though respond with something along the lines of, "good I wasn't planning on sleeping with you anyway." or "It's okay that other girl is hotter anyways." Girls hate it when other girls are hotter than they are. She will almost immediately try and prove you wrong. Then when it is time to leave say something along the line of, "So we are going back to my place now for some more drinks." Assert yourself without being overbearing. But let her know the decision has been made. If you assert yourself with confidence, make her think you are the alpha male, one of the 10% percent of men who do 90% of the fucking and you will be home free. But guys if you get back to your place and she really doesn't want to have sex then respect it. NO means no for real. ^I'm with stupid. Played the pick-up game for years when I was younger, but not with lame lines. It's more in your behaviour and how you treat women, rather than the first words out of your mouth. I still play the game from time to time (just for friends). Got many female friends telling my wife how lucky she is. :lol: She knows I could pick up again. I'm an average looking bloke with an average dick, I just happen to behave in the right way I guess. Pick up lines are lame.

not sure if these were said but oh well... Hi, My name is Chance. Do I have one? Lie down. I think I love you Is that dress felt? Would you like it to be? Should I call you in the morning or just nudge you? Nice dress, Can I talk you out of it? I need someone really bad. Are you really bad? Do you believe in love at first sight? If not I'll walk by again. Hi, I make more money than you can spend. You look like my next girlfriend Beauty is only a light switch away. If I were you I'd do me. :thumbup:

The Secret Word Of The Day Is " Legs "........ Lets Go Home And Spread The Word

"Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"

here are some from your's truelly, a few which have worked hahaha, all being used while i was completely obliterated ofcourse "hey, your hot!" "do you have any idea what i would do to you if you didnt have a boyfriend right now?" "hey, i wanna hook up with you real bad" "I mean if you dont wanna walk back to your place I live right next door...huh?..... just tryin to save you a walk geez no need to act all bitchy" "hey ....what? yea im wasted....where you going?"

some of my favs fuck me if im wrong you wanna kiss me dont you ? :laughingr (have used) do you have and indian in you ? want some ?

If you're really looking to land some ass make the chick validate herself to you. DO NOT CHASE HER make her chase you. You do not need to be anything more than an average looking guy for it to work. Don't let her know you think she's cute, she probably gets that 20 times a day. Seem uninterested and she will want you. It works a lot!! Make her think there is something wrong with her and she will want to show you there is not. And guys if a girl tells you "I'm not going to sleep with you tonight." You're home free already. This shows sleeping with you is already on her mind and she wants you to chase her. Don't bite though respond with something along the lines of, "good I wasn't planning on sleeping with you anyway." or "It's okay that other girl is hotter anyways." Girls hate it when other girls are hotter than they are. She will almost immediately try and prove you wrong. Then when it is time to leave say something along the line of, "So we are going back to my place now for some more drinks." Assert yourself without being overbearing. But let her know the decision has been made. If you assert yourself with confidence, make her think you are the alpha male, one of the 10% percent of men who do 90% of the fucking and you will be home free. But guys if you get back to your place and she really doesn't want to have sex then respect it. NO means no for real. not trying to be conceited here, just trying to help my bike peeps. someones been reading PUA books

Wow! A lot of these are awesome. Might use a few one day. Who knows lol. I got one! If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg was Christmas-could I visit you between the holidays!?

Would you like to get something to eat?' How's pizza and a cock sound? .....SLAP!!.....OK!...OK!..NO Pizza.

nice shoes, lets f*ck:D

I'm not big on pick-up lines but i do have one to get rid of a girl I had a girl follow me around all night at a bar. It was getting pretty annoying so after about 2 hours I walked up to her in her group of friends and said: " My dad always told me that when I come to a place like this, find the best looking girl there and go talk to her". She kinda giggled and let out a sigh of flattery. Right then I said "but she just went in the bathroom so I thought I'd come talk to you". She actually took off her heel and busted me in the side of the head. I think that's what those things must be made for. :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr

She actually took off her heel and busted me in the side of the head. :laughingr :funny: :lol:

i like this one " both your parents must be retared... because your special"

i like this one " both your parents must be retared... because your special" LMAO.....:funny: :laughingr

i like this one " both your parents must be retared... because your special" :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr thats funny

Here's the ones they use on me :( Save your breath. You'll need it to blow up your date. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. The more I think of you, the less I think of you. You look like a million bucks! (All green and wrinkled.) Why don't you slip into something more comfortable...like a coma. I never forget a face...but in your case I'll make an exception! What am I? Flypaper for freaks? 100,000 sperm to choose from, and you were the fastest. ----- Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to walk by again? If it's true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning! Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?. or Me: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Her: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore. Me: Is this seat empty? Her: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Me: So, what do you do for a living? Her: I'm a female impersonator. Me: Hey baby, what's your sign? Her: Do not enter. Me: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Her: Unfertilized. Me: Your body is like a temple. Her: Sorry, there are no services today. Me: I would go to the end of the world for you. Her: But would you stay there? Me: Your place or mine? Her: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine. Me: Fine with me, I don't care where you go after we're done in the car. Me: Would you like to dance? Her: I don't like this song, but even if I did, I wouldn't dance with you. Me: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said, you look fat in those pants.

hahahhah those are good!

if a chick ever gives you a mean response when you try to hit on her say this "jeez, you don't have to be so picky.....i wasn't!!" haha

you are not going to belive this but it has worked on a number of occations. walk up to a girl and simply give a hafe grin and said " A " when she says what just say " A wat u doin " not kidin it f in works i don't understand. but thinn again i live in ky so the standard must not be to high.

"jeez, you don't have to be so picky.....i wasn't!!" :lol:

how about one of these: If you were a fish you'd be a keeper or if you were a fish Id mount you lol

This is one I used to use for laughs back in high school. Me: Hey wanna go to a dinner and a movie? Her: Sure. Me: Oh By the way. I mean dinner as you give me head, and movie as I videotape it.

if a chick ever gives you a mean response when you try to hit on her say this "jeez, you don't have to be so picky.....i wasn't!!" haha hahahahhahaa

roses are red, violets are blue, i have no other intentions, but to fuck you.

Oh a rhyme! Yay!.

i had a girl tell me "im part of the make a wish foundation, and my with is to get a ride on your bike, then ride you." i was buggging out. Nice english.....:cool:

i got a mirror in my pocket want to see it

Are your parents retarded.. Because you look special You look fat in those pants... I mean phat:thefinger

want to sit on my bike baby:bowdown:

guy:hey do you know what time it is? girl: (a time) guy: no, it's time for us to fuck. lol...

i dont wanna fuck you, i wanna make love with you.

"i wanna make romance inside of you" there is this t-shirt i saw that says "Making love is something my girlfriend does while i fuck her" man did i laugh my ass off

"i wanna make romance inside of you" there is this t-shirt i saw that says "Making love is something my girlfriend does while i fuck her" man did i laugh my ass off that's a good one

"congratulations, you're my next girlfriend!" lol i know it's lame...

My girl went to the club tonight and was telling me about all of the lines guys were using on her.......I didn't realize chicks had heard the same shit that many times. The male race is FN pathetic. One guy actually used the windex-pants thing. Luckily she got his number for me so I guess I'm making a phone call tommorow. What a deuch. There was actually a guy who brought her a little heart balloon. Fuck.......I need an ugly girlfriend.:laughingr :laughingr :laughingr

my favorite: Hey baby if you're going to regret this in the morning... we can sleep til noon.

my favorite: Hey baby if you're going to regret this in the morning... we can sleep til noon. i have one similar to that... "if you dont wanna have a one night stand, we can do it for another night."

Here's the ones they use on me :( Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?. Thats an awesome ice breaker. you can definetely get a smile from a girl by saying that. ive used it already. it works great :thumbup:

go up to her and sing the verse in the biggie song "Big Poppa" Straight up Hunny i be asking. Most of these niggas think they mackin but they just acting., who they attracting with that line what your name what your size. As soon as he buy that wine ill creep up from behind and ask you what your interest are WHO U BE WITH, things that make you smile, what numbers to dial, you gonna call your crew i call my crew and we can rendevous around the bar around 2. Works Everytime.

Works Everytime. Dude what kind of women do you pick up for that pick-up line to work...lol:lol:

ugly ones

ugly ones :laughingr Honesty..so hard to find these days.:thumbup:

Works Everytime. Dude what kind of women do you pick up for that pick-up line to work...lol:lol: :laughingr :funny: :rofl: :lol: Gangsta b1tches.:arsenal

how bout, I know I'm not the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

how bout, I know I'm not the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you. :clap: hmm maybe ill tweak that a bit and say this instead "i know i'm not the richest guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you."

When I was a young man and not married I would use: Looking at her a bit confused.......I would say: "Didn't you and I go to seperate schools together"? she would think about that for a second ....then laugh....IF I got a laugh I was "in". OR if I was feeling frisky and conversation was moving along: "I will do things to you that your current lover never realized existed"

that must be a keg in your pants cause i wanna tap that ass

my love for you is like diarreha.. i just cant hold it in did you just fart? cuz you blew me away

me: did it smell? her: when? me: when you came out my ass... CUZ YOUR DA SHIT

I like your outfit, but it would look better on the floor next to my bed in the morning

some pretty good ones in here

When I was a young man and not married I would use: Looking at her a bit confused.......I would say: "Didn't you and I go to seperate schools together"? she would think about that for a second ....then laugh....IF I got a laugh I was "in". OR if I was feeling frisky and conversation was moving along: "I will do things to you that your current lover never realized existed" i like the first one

How's about we go back to my place for a fuck and a pizza? What . . . you don't like pizza?!? :D

Do you have a quarter I can borrow? Because I have to call God and tell him I found his missing angel.

nice dress, but you'd look better without em.

hey baby ... u drink ... because if u do... i bet, i can out drink u :) hey baby is that a mirror in your panties or do u want a drink ?? ill hold your legs... if u want to do a keg stand sorry just made those ones up lol

"Get in the car bitch or you'll never see your mother again, decide." rofl! damn dood niceeeee

Go up to A girl...look directly into her eyes and say...Hurry up and give me your number before I don't want it any more...LOL.

Shhhhhhhhhhh... Shhhhhhhhhhh, Don't make this rape turn into a murder.

Shhhhhhhhhhh... Shhhhhhhhhhh, Don't make this rape turn into a murder. LOL...you sick fuck...hahahaha.

Well hi good lookin, ever had a pussy stretched across your face?? No? well then what were ya then, a butthole baby? :clap: Now buy me a beer

Nice Shoes... Lets F#ck

guy: what's the word of the day? girl: huh? guy: legs, spread em out

hey baby whats the goin' rate?

Geez, with lines like that, maybe the ladies will avoid this thread altogether.

Geez, with lines like that, maybe the ladies will avoid this thread altogether. notice the thread title... "worst pick up lines"

D-oooh!

my love for you is like Diarrhea... i can't hold it in

my love for you is like Diarrhea... i can't hold it in and keep stinkin the area? haha

how about... want a 7up or a mount-and-do?

how about... want a 7up or a mount-and-do? that was better than you're last one...hehe:clap:

that was better than you're last one...hehe:clap: haha thanks... of course 7up would only apply to those worthy... those who arent fortunate enough shouldnt use that line... hahaha

nice legs. what time do they open?

you're naturally beautiful, no need for makeup and a dress.

did you hear? "leg" is the word of teh day, lets go back to my place and spread the word.

hey baby sit in my lap and we'll talk about what comes up

These lines are the BEST I like this thread keep em coming......:bowdown: :laughingr

did you hear? "leg" is the word of teh day, lets go back to my place and spread the word. that was very similar to what i said on the previous page

call me Jack Daniel im a good liquor (licker)

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: so freakin funny:bounce

rofl, i dont read all the pages its like...11 pages? so yeah nice one on the jack daniels :D

http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/confused/confused0086.gif

hehehe thanks!

ill be the hidden dragon you be the crouching tiger

if you come to my place i'll cum in yours

ill be your duracell bunny, ill just keep going and going and going...

You hungry? Come back to my place. I can cook but I'd rather eat out if you know what I mean.

Hey, want a roofie Cool-latta? All right, gig-idy-gig-idy...

i dont know your future but i sure can tell your background

you must be from tennesse because you are the only ten i see

I may not be Fred Flintstone but I bet I could make your Bed Rock.

Whats the difference between a barmaid & a horse? Not everyones ridden a horse!:D

look at her and say,your dady must of been a thief,shes says why you say he stold the stars out of the sky and put the twinkle in your eyes

here is what my little brother uses,do you want to fuck or do i owe you an apologe, you are going to get lucky or slapped one of the two

How about a Pizza and a Fu*k????? when they say "No" be like What you dont like pizza?????

Can I smell your feet??? when they say No be like it must be you pu$sy Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call fine print

I didnt bother reading all the previous pages but this one works!! "Nice shoes...wanna fu*k?" My husband tells me that a lot... I have really nice shoes!!! LOL

here is what my little brother uses,do you want to fuck or do i owe you an apologe, you are going to get lucky or slapped one of the two a buddy of mine did that and 2 out of 10 times it really worked. I didnt bother reading all the previous pages but this one works!! "Nice shoes...wanna fu*k?" My husband tells me that a lot... I have really nice shoes!!! LOL nice :thumbup:

ask her what her favorite number is. whatever she says say "oh really? why's that?". after she explains it say "mine is 88", she'll ask why. "because most girls like to get ate (8) twice"....:laughingr

say... "wanna walk a block away?"

it's cool my wife's into it. she lets me date. honest

baby your feet must be tired cuz you been running through my mind all day

Can I tickle your belly button from the inside?

Can I tickle your belly button from the inside? :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr

If you were words in a book, you would definetely be the fine print!

"if you were a tear in my eye, i would not cry for the fear of losing you":thumbup:

i have one for ya....this one time i was out with a friend shoppin an a guy come up to me and asked me if it hurt (i was dumb founded) and asked did what hurt?.....then he said when u feel from heaven cause girl u an angel dropped to me from heaven, an all i could do is laugh an walk off.... dont get me wrong he was a very good lookin guy but after tht cheesy line i couldnt bring myself to stand there an talk to him....but then i few weeks later i ran into him again an he didnt try no cheesy lines on me he jus came up an talked like a normal person....lol:lol:

some of my favs fuck me if im wrong you wanna kiss me dont you ? :laughingr (have used) do you have and indian in you ? want some ? :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr

best line ever !! and it works over half the time, well it did before i got married.....catch that female starring at you from across the bar club or where ever...walk straight up to her and make sure to look her dead in the eyes (don't mean mug her...but make sure you're being very personal) and say "Come on, let's go" and then start walking to where ever you want her to go ....this does work! :thumbup: try it out fellas since i can't anymore :cool:

:laughingr :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr boy where have you been...those are some old ones...lol ;)

while on my bike at a stoplight some guy pulled up nexted to me and asked "do you like to ride dirty?" i had no idea what it even meant so i ignored him and took off when the light turned green so i could lose him. definitely the worst pickup line ever.

ok girls what do you think. Nice shoes wanna fuck? lol(never used this one before) My friend actually used this one in High school and then got punched by her boyfriend (party where everyone was drunk.) Wound up dating her like 6 months later. Funny shit.

I have a shirt that says this one!! I may not be mister right, But i will fuck you untill he shows up:laughingr

I hope that i don't screw this one up i heard it when i was drunk when nite at a bar when a friend spit this off to a waitress. He holds out his arm with a wrist watch on it and asks the girl have you ever seen one of these magic watches? She replies what do you mean it is magic? He replies well right now it is saying that you don't have any panties on? She replies well it must be broken because i do have some on. He replies damn it must be an hour fast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope that i don't screw this one up i heard it when i was drunk when nite at a bar when a friend spit this off to a waitress. He holds out his arm with a wrist watch on it and asks the girl have you ever seen one of these magic watches? She replies what do you mean it is magic? He replies well right now it is saying that you don't have any panties on? She replies well it must be broken because i do have some on. He replies damn it must be an hour fast!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :clap: :clap: :clap: I might have to use that one.

:rofl: :funny: :thumbup: :clap: :laughingr :lol: I hope that i don't screw this one up i heard it when i was drunk when nite at a bar when a friend spit this off to a waitress. He holds out his arm with a wrist watch on it and asks the girl have you ever seen one of these magic watches? She replies what do you mean it is magic? He replies well right now it is saying that you don't have any panties on? She replies well it must be broken because i do have some on. He replies damn it must be an hour fast!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wow... thats awesome.. im gonna use it:bounce

I hope that i don't screw this one up i heard it when i was drunk when nite at a bar when a friend spit this off to a waitress. He holds out his arm with a wrist watch on it and asks the girl have you ever seen one of these magic watches? She replies what do you mean it is magic? He replies well right now it is saying that you don't have any panties on? She replies well it must be broken because i do have some on. He replies damn it must be an hour fast!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :laughingr :laughingr :clap:

Here's one I found really funny when I heard it. Go up to a girl in a bar and say "would you have sex with me for a million dollars?" -let's just say she says yes Then say "okay, so would you have sex with me for a buck?" -she says no Then you say "well we figured out what kind of girl you are now we're just trying to bargain on the price"

Pick up lines...go here! (http://www.linesthataregood.com/pointy.html)

Heres a couple from overseas that work every time 60% of the time :cool: Number 1! You :"Where are you from?" Her: (does'nt matter what she says, ignore her) You:"Jamica!?" Her: "Wtf..i did'nt say Jamica?" You: "Jamican me crazy!" Number 2! You: "I'm hung like Saddam Husien" Now use these wisely! ;)

Anyone use the magic watch one yet. LOL Let me know how it works out for yall. It has only paid off maybe 1 out of 10 for me. HAHA

wew I'm tired! can i go to sleep in your bushes? :headshake

:clap: :thumbup: :laughingr call me Jack Daniel im a good liquor (licker)

:clap: :thumbup: :laughingr thanks

hope you got a big trunk....cause im puttin my bike in it!:hmmm::clap: :laughingr :clap: :thumbup:

your like a 10 lb bass I dont know weather to mount you or eat you:clap: :laughingr :clap: :thumbup:

Girl your so fine i love every muscle in your body...especially mine....

are those moon pants you wearing? CUZ YO ASS IS OUT OF THIS WORLD

does your face hurt? cause its killing me

Do you like whales? Cause theres a hump back at mine!

Can I borrow a Quarter? I have to call God and tell him I found his missing angel!

I used this one to pick up my fiance. "Do you have a pussy?" (actually worked.)

I used this one to pick up my fiance. "Do you have a pussy?" (actually worked.) ugh

ugh Okay, let me explain the situation. Me and 2 buddies were at the bar drinkn, and started talking about my buddies cat. Well in the imature stuper we started calling the cat a pussy cause we thought it was funny. Well when his girlfriend came in with her friend (which they were tryin to introduce to me) they dared me to ask her if she had a "pussy" (cat). So I said "Do you have a pussy?" (first time I ever met her, and first thing out of my mouth) Her reply was "What kind of question is that?" After that we started talking and about a week later we hooked up. That was two and a half years ago.

I'm not a fan of pick-up lines, but I have used this 3 times, and it has worked 2 of the 3 times. I would suggest using it in a place you don't normally go. You walk up to a girl, and you say to her, "If you were a pirate, which shoulder would the parrot sit?" Nice 3-5 second pause. You then ask her while touching her shoulder that is closest to you, "Would he sit here?" Another 3-5 second pause. You then put your arm around her other shoulder and ask, "Or would he sit here?" So, you now have your arm perfectly around her shoulder, and it looks like a classy pose. 2 for 3 on this Line, and the only time it didn't work was because the girls boyfriend was there, and saw it. Barely made it out alive of that bar. Again, I'm not a pick-up line guy because I prefer to just be myself, and that usually doesn't get me all that far, but I'm honest, and most women like that.

here's a nice shirt with a pick up line http://www.choiceshirts.com/images/A1/55/A1557F-md-b.jpg

baby you must be like morning in a farm -because my cock wont stay still.

you look at the tag inside her shirt and say "Just as i thought.... Made in Heaven" +1 that might get a good responce

I can't believe people use those lines.

"girl you better shift or I'm going to blow a seal"

i always like the one " come with me if u want to live" and have your friend start shooting a gun in the backround works every time :thumbup:

th@s an ugly fuckin shirt ...

i always like the one " come with me if u want to live" and have your friend start shooting a gun in the backround works every time :thumbup: The question is how many times can you attempt this before running out of friends to be the wingman?:lol:

Is that a mirror in your pants, cause I can see myself in 'em...

:popcorn: :laughingr

Nice bum, where ya from?:cool:

i like these wanna fuck and to mcdonalds.....no.......what you would rather go to burger king? fuck me if im wrong, but is your name yolanda. i dont know math good but i know this- you plus me, minus our clothes, divide your legs and we'll multiply. ya know where your clothes would look good? she says, no!? you say, piled up on my floor! cant think of anymore right now

nice shoes. wanna fuck? ah, thats was my cousin's favorite, he was the best

guy shows up to a bar, asks female bartender, "do you work tommorrow?" she says "no", he says "good that way we can sleep in"

Me: Do u Fuck on first Date's ? Her: Sick prick get your mind out of the gutter Me: well it's Normaly in the sewer so i'll take that as a complement :thefinger

"Wanna go half's on a bastard?"

I'm a bio major and I hear people say this one all the time: "If I were an enzyme i would be DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes" HAHAHAHA :laughingr Oh man it's so bad.

I'm a bio major and I hear people say this one all the time: "If I were an enzyme i would be DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes" HAHAHAHA :laughingr Oh man it's so bad. LOL thats really bad hahha

"Wanna go half's on a bastard?" :laughingr :laughingr :laughingr "Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!"

"you're gorgeous, get naked" haha from this one http://www.break.com/index/caller_hits_on_host.html fucking hilarious, what a dumb blonde. haha

"you're gorgeous, get naked" haha from this one http://www.break.com/index/caller_hits_on_host.html fucking hilarious, what a dumb blonde. haha That's a REALLY old video, but damn that guy had ballz... my favorite part is she starts to blush and he might have gotten a date lol

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you? :laughingr :laughingr :rofl:

I'll make you so wet you'll dehydrate!

if youre 18 it doesnt matter how old i am now u wanna ride or not

Hi, my name is Roger doesn't seem to work for me so it must be bad.:headscrat

How bout..."Please tell your b00bs to stop staring at my eyes"

LOL...you sick fuck...hahahaha. :funny: :laughingr

Hahaha

Do you guys actually use these?

"im a producer, wanna fuck?"

Im a nice guy....... I pull out!!!!!

i just get my wife to talk to them.:thumbup:

Did you fart? Cuz you blew me away Are yer parents retarded? Cuz ya sure are special My Love fer you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it in You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went inta this cheap motel room Yer face reminds me of a wrench... Every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.:laughingr :laughingr :laughingr we should all get a poll going to see which one is the best one.

You know why i'm here, now get naked. yeah, but i've done it to a ex before, kinda funny story.....lol lol

Did you fart? Cuz you blew me away Are yer parents retarded? Cuz ya sure are special My Love fer you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it in You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went inta this cheap motel room Yer face reminds me of a wrench... Every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.:laughingr :laughingr :laughingr we should all get a poll going to see which one is the best one. this contest is over:lol:

NO , BUY YOUR OWN DRINK & IF U PLAY YOUR CARDS RIGHT U JUST MIGHT GET A PIECE OF THIS :thumbup: